Preoccupied

Its been hard, to say the least, to concentrate on things right now. I feel like I have been in a state of limbo since the day we found out about the alarming results of my blood work. I have been hanging on by a thread in my math class (since that time), and, today was the proof that I am just not there mentally. I studied for the test that I took today and did it help? Nope - not one bit. When I sat down to take the test, it's like everything I thought I knew went flying out of my head and all I could think about was finding out the results of the CVS. About what it would mean if our baby had Down's syndrome or Trisomy 18 or 13. About what the cystic hygroma was coming from and what that means for our baby. 

Needless to say, my mind was in another place during this test and, it showed in my score. I got a 68 on my exam today. A 68. A freakin' D. I don't get D's. Especially when I study. Even in math (not my strong suit). My grade went from an 84% to a 76.7% in the course. 

With all that is going on in my life, I am not about to beat myself up about this. Not when the health and life of my of child is unknown. I think I'll save my worry and my hurt and sadness for that. Plus, my teacher revealed in class today that as of fall 2014, you don't even need math 111 as a requirement to take statistics. Kind of b*llshit since I've already taken 8 weeks of this damn class and I am only taking this class to prepare myself to transition into a bachelors program once I get my associates if applied sciences in nursing. ANNOYING.

Anyway, so, there it is...I got a D on a test. 

Whatever.