Jeslyn's Journey...and Beyond: Noah's Quest 2014

I found out about Noah's Quest at Brief Encounters (something I talk about a lot!), and as soon as I found out about it I knew it was something I wanted me and my family to participate in. Noah's Quest is a charity event that raises money for Brief Encounters (the non-profit organization that puts on the event) as well as other causes that are similar and/or helpful for those who have lost a child. It consists of a dove release, a 1k walk/run for kids, a 5k walk/run for kids and adults, and a 10k run for adults. There's also face painting, a kids zone (a play ground as well as a bounce house) and an informational booth with info on different resources for pregnancy/baby loss. This year was the 9th annual event, and the event itself is inspired by Carol and Cary, parents of Noah, who was born still on September 28th, 2005. When they created the event, they used it as an outlet for their grief and as a way to keep the memory of their son live. It's become much more than that though - it's a place for parents, friends, grandparents, aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, cousins, and anyone who has been touched by the loss of a child to honor and remember their loved one(s) life as well as share their grief and their story with other families experiencing something similar.

I'd been watching the weather in Sandy (where the event was held) all week, because today is the day I will run my first ever 10k. I've never run a race in rain, so, that was kind of worrisome to me. But, no matter...I was going to run the race, no matter what. Today's event started at 8:45a with a dove release which was very peaceful and sort of set the tone for the event. Following the dove release was the 1k walk/run for the kids. It was so cute to see the kids run their race. They were so excited and some of them were even competitive! Some of the littler kiddos rain with their parents and that was cute to see too.

After the kids finished their race, we begun staging for the 10k race. For some reason...I wasn't nervous. I was very calm and ready. Maybe because I felt Jeslyn with me <3 Before I knew it, the race started and we were off. After the straight away came the first AND second hills. I was not happy, hehe Hills are my arch nemesis and I usually walk them. But, today I was running a race, and I had it in my head that I wanted to run the whole 6.2 miles. So, I ran those hills...or trotted up them, I should say. I wasn't running at the pace I wanted to going up those hills, but, I at least put one foot in front of the other and pushed onward. I thought several times about why I was running...to keep myself from quitting. I reminded myself over and over that I was running for Jeslyn. Running to remember her and to honor her. After I made it up the hills, the course was pretty flat for a while...until it was time to head into the forest. So, up another hill I went until I descended into the forest. It was beautiful - and muddy! But, it was fun to get to run through the trees and have a little cover from the light mist that was falling on me. I enjoyed running while I was in the forest, it felt serene. It felt like I had been transported to another place and I was alone and one with the world. Just me and my thought about my girl...until I ran up on yet another hill. I managed to trot up it and then down the other side, and, I thought I was home free with the hills at that point. But, nope! There was yet another pretty steep hill on the ascension out of the forest. The runner ahead of me stopped running and walked up the hill...I should've followed suit (to conserve a little energy). Instead, stubborn me decided I needed to trot up it. So, I did. But I was TIRED afterwards, that's for sure. I was happy to make it out of that forest and it turned out that that would be the last hill on the course. THANK GOODNESS! It was pretty smooth sailing after that point and since the course was a 5k that you run twice, I knew I would be coming up on the start line at some point and I would get to see Alberto and Isla and all the other wonderful families cheering us all on. I was so excited because seeing their faces would motivate me to keep going. Sure enough, I came up on Alberto and Isla at the straight away to the start line and they cheered me on and gave me the boost I needed to start the second leg of the race. I knew that as soon as I finished the straight away though, that I would have to run those two hills again. Dang it! ha As much as I wanted to run the whole race...when I got about a quarter of the way up the first hill, I had to walk. Disappointing, but, I needed the break...not just because I was tired, but, I could feel blisters starting to form on my feet. When I got to the top of that hill (maybe they weren't hills...just inclines? hehe) and turned the corner, I started running again. But, I ran up on the second hill/incline and again began walking. This is where the turning point came for me. From this point on, running was painful for me and it became a fight against my feet for the duration of the race. I walked/ran the rest of the race, grunting and wincing from the pain most of the way. At some point before I descended into the forest again, I stopped to tie my shoes tighter, hoping that would help with the rubbing. No such luck. On I went though, pushing through the pain as best I could. Pulling on thoughts of finishing for my girl for motivation. Although that helped to keep me going, I couldn't wait to get out of that forest! I knew I didn't have to fight anymore hills once I was out of it, and that I only had about 1.5-2 miles to go. On this last portion of my run, I passed lots of families/groups walking the 5k and they were so nice to cheer me on and give me more motivation to finish. With each step though, I felt the burning sensation from the blisters, and I couldn't get to the finish line fast enough! Finally, I was on the home stretch and Alberto and Isla were in my sights. I tried to pick up the pace and finish strong. I did, somewhat, heh. But, it didn't really matter, because...I WAS DONE! 1:03.33. Not the fastest, but, I completed the race and that was an accomplishment on it's own. I DID IT!!! For my baby. For my husband, for my Isla...and for myself. As soon as I could, I took my shoes off and there they were. Blood/pus blisters. OUCH! I didn't bring flip flops (wtf was I thinking?), so, I walked around barefoot the rest of the time.

While we waited for all the walkers/runners to finish, I lit a candle for Jeslyn in the tent with the memorial candles. It always feels good to light a candle and watch the flame burn in remembrance of my girl <3 We also took pictures and I ran around and played with Isla (she all of a sudden wanted to be a runner like mama - so incredibly cute!) too. After everyone was done with the race, Pat Schwiebert talked about what this event means and she read off some really awesome magnets. My favorite? "Warning: grief zone ahead". She is so inspirational, and I enjoyed listening to her words. While she was speaking, it began to rain rather hard...and, I couldn't help but think it was all of our babies crying on us. Letting us know that they felt loved, honored, and remembered. With the rain, Pat and Carol decided it was time to unveil the memorial walkway. Carol and some of the kids in attendance picked up the rocks and the blanket that was covering the walkway and then they walked across it, revealing the walkway for everyone to see. It was beautiful. Absolutely perfect. I laid eyes on Jeslyn's brick immediately. My heart swelled with pride and joy and I was happy. So happy and so proud to have a brick there for my baby among all the other amazing angel babies' bricks. We took a few pictures as a family and a few pictures with Jeslyn's brick. We also talked to a few mamas (so lovely to see you MMT!) and tried to find bricks for mamas who couldn't make it out. After about a half an hour, Isla began to get restless, so, we decided it was time to make our way home.

It was such a lovely event, and, I am so grateful to have been apart of it. I feel like I am part of a bigger cause...and that is to bring awareness far and wide about baby loss, and, to honor the life of my baby and the lives of all the other sweet angel babies in the process.

Here are a few photos from today :-)